...at first sight

Happy Birthday, dear Grandma,
Happy Birthday to you!


Emma took a shaky, deep breath and blew out the candle on her cupcake.  "100 years old today", she thought to herself..  She never would have imagined she'd live this long, not with her careless, adventure laden life.  Boy had it been a good one though.


"Grandma, what's it like to be 100?" Maggie asked, gently sitting on the edge of her grandmother's bed.

Emma knew you weren't supposed to have favorites, but Maggie held a special place in her heart.  Out of the 12 grandchildren her daughter Eva had given her, only Maggie shared the same flaming red hair and fiery temper.  Maggie also was the thrill seeker.  Apparently that trait skips generations as Eva, Emma's only child was as timid and shy as a rabbit.  Maggie, though, was a spitfire.  She had dropped out of college, much to her parents horror, to pursue a life as a stunt-double.  She made damn good money at it, too  Unfortunately, the career meant a move to California and Emma rarely saw Maggie now.

"Its been a long journey Mags.  I wouldn't trade my life or my experiences for anything.  Good or bad, its been my life.  Can't say I thought I'd see this day though, not with what I put this body through."

Maggie looked at her grandmother, suddenly seeing the frailty and hearing the years in her voice.  "Grandma, what is your best memory?  What day would you go back and relive if you could?"

"Oh that's an easy one Mags, it would be the day I met your grandpa!"

Maggie looked uncomfortable for a minute.  She shifted herself carefully on the bed and opened and closed her mouth several times.  Each time she looked like she was about to say something, but stopped.

"Out with it Mags, what's bothering you?"  Emma caught Maggie's eyes and held them.  The stare said there would be no sidestepping her.

Maggie thought for a moment and then blurted "You would go back to that day even now knowing that grandpa would leave you with the shame of an unwed pregnancy?"

"Honey darling, war happened.  Its not like your grandfather up and disappeared.  He got himself enlisted and god bless his soul died during his very first battle. We had a nice night right before he left, though.  Ain't ashamed in that and I have never, not once, been ashamed of my Eva.  Have I ever told you about the day I met your grandpa?  Oh he was so handsome!"

Maggie had heard the story a hundred times, but let her grandmother continue.

"I was out looking for some fabric to sew my wedding dress.  You know I was supposed to marry that old fuddy-duddy Marshall Whitmore, right?  Well anyway, there I was walking down Main Street, having myself a right darn good cry because I couldn't afford even the cheap cotton over at Mary's shop.  How was I supposed to marry Marshall, who was the mayor at that time, without a proper wedding dress?  Everything I had back on the farm had yellowed.  As I said, I was having myself a right good cry about it.  That's when I felt an arm go around my stomach and a strong man was pulling me out of the path of Mr. McDermott's Ford."  Emma seemed to brighten at the memory as a small smile crossed her mouth.  "It wasn't proper for a man to touch a woman like that back then, so I gave that stranger a right good lashing with my tongue.  Boy, oh boy though was he pretty to look at so once I was done acting proper, I flashed my best smile his way."

"And the rest is history." Maggie interrupted.  "Grandpa bought you lunch and some of Mary's finest cotton and in the process stole your heart.  Honestly Grandma, how could that be your favorite day?  Surely mom's birth or one of your amazing trips could top that day?"

Emma just smiled and closed her eyes.  "No honey.  You'll understand the day you meet your man and see your future.  Sure ours was short, but we'll have forever together when I leave this earth and I'm itching to have those arms around me again."

"You come'n around tomorrow to see your old grandma before you head back home, right?  I'm getting tired and want to get to dreamin' about your grandpa again."  Emma shift her pillows and closed her eyes.

"Of course Grandma.  I love you.  I'll see you tomorrow."  Maggie bent over and kissed Emma's cheek, then picked up her purse and got her sweater from the bureau.  Before she had time to shut the door, Emma was already snoring.

Maggie was still dumbfounded as she walked down the hallway.  "No way just meeting a man for the first time could be that special!" Maggie thought.  Just then the elevator doors opened and Maggie's world changed.


--------------------------------------------------------------

For the IndieInk Writing Challenge this week, Kirsten Doyle challenged me with "You are at your own 100th birthday party, reflecting back on your life.  Tell us about the best day of your life, from your 100 year old-self" and I challenged Kurt with "Your character wakes up only to realize it wasn't a dream/nightmare".

Since I had just done a 1st person last week, I took a few liberties and went with characters.  I had also wanted to challenge myself with dialog, something I suck at.  But yes, meeting my husband so far has been the best day of my life.

Orphan

I'm a 25 year old orphan.  Well, ok, not in the traditional sense.  My parents are alive and well, I am just dead to them.

I had a normal relationship with them until I met Roger.  Roger and I were fire and ice, steamy hot during the good times but ice cold when we argued.  We had been together for 3 months when we decided to get married.

My parents were against it from the beginning.  Being an Irish Catholic family there were rules to how this was done and we were breaking every last one.  Much to my mother's horror, Roger and I were living together 3 weeks into our courtship.  That alone was the sin to end all sin.  According to my mother it was all fire and brimstone for my afterlife.  My father said nothing.  I just got the look.

Roger didn't want a Catholic marriage.  We argued into the early morning hours night after night about it.  My parents expected a religious ceremony.  They damn well demanded it.  For everything I had done so far, I could at least give them that.  Let them marry their only daughter the proper way.  Save them from the scorn, ridicule and gossip that was surely already festering among the old biddies at their Church.

Roger won though.  He had given me an ultimatum - elope or lose him forever.  I was young and stupid.  He was my world and so we took a "vacation" and I got married at some Elvis drive-thru chapel in Vegas.  I cried through the ceremony.  Roger assumed they were tears of joy.  He gleefully told my parents what we had done, said it was my idea.  My parents didn't speak to me for a year.

I sent them a letter when Rosie and Sophie were born.  My father was the one to call.  They had one condition - I was to come back to the Church.  Roger welcomed them with open arms, said he had been pushing me to make amends since the wedding and that we would be sitting right next to them every Sunday.  Funny how he never made a single Mass.

By that point I was pro at hiding the bruises.  Concealer is an amazing product - having a damn good poker face is another.  Roger hit me on our wedding night so that I would "learn my place".  I've lost count of the number of times I've "tripped and fallen" since.  I always left just a little bit showing.  Just a smidgen, enough for someone looking close.  Every Sunday I would sit next to my mother and silently pray that she would finally notice, finally ask.  My mother apparently has an even better poker face.  The closest I got was a comment that my "mascara had run" and I "might want to go touch up my face".

Father Mel saw right through me the first Mass I attended.  He quickly befriended me. Asking how I was at the end of each Mass, inviting me for coffee.  I always politely turned him down.  What exactly could I have in common with a 70 year old Priest?

One Sunday, though, I just accepted.  I didn't want to.  I wasn't planning on it, but still "Sure" came right out of my mouth.  My mom took the girls and Father Mel walked with me to the corner coffee shop.  Over coffee words just tumbled out of my mouth, desperately trying to fill the void.  Father Mel just looked at me and listened to me ramble on about nothing and everything.  Finally he stopped me and simply asked: "how long has it been happening and when was it going to end?"

The question took my breath away.  Then I laughed in his face.  I didn't mean to, but really "End it?".  Does he think I haven't dreamed of that?  How the hell was I supposed to stop a 250lb man from hitting me?  It was Father Mel who suggested a divorce and the escape plan.  I was never married in the Church, so it was never "official" anyway.  He said my parents would understand.  They were good people.  They wouldn't want this life for their daughter or grand-daughters.  He would come with me, support me when I told them and give me a safe haven when I left Roger.

I never got the chance.  One of my mother's friends was at the coffee shop and overheard us.  She called my mother out of "concern" for my eternal soul.  Fearing that I would divorce Roger, my mother told him about my "date" with Father Mel.  He beat the shit out of me that night.  Left me for dead.  I wasn't though.  He fell asleep on the couch and I got the gun.

I'm serving 15 years now.  They labeled it manslaughter, but I murdered him and my only regret is that I could only do it once.

I've been told my parents are calling it an accident.  That there was never any talk of divorce.  I guess they got that much right.  I never did get to ask Roger for one.

For the IndieInk Writing Challenge this week, Britania challenged me with "Your character has to tell her extremely religious parents that he/she is getting a divorce" and I challenged Carrie with "Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example. - Mark Twain The Tragedy of Pudd'nhead Wilson".

The Path Less Traveled

I hate strategy games.  I always have and still  I somehow managed to get a job where I played one every day.  Even something as simple as saying "Hi" to the Boss was a mind boggling exercise in frustration.  Say "good morning" and risk being noticed and singled out to complete some asinine project he won't even remember asking for.  Ignore him and risk the dreaded "Not a Team Player" label.  It was like walking a tight rope every day, while juggling flaming bowling balls.  I hated it, but I played it well, rose through the ranks and was a top employee.

Sitting at my desk at work, I wondered what the hell I was doing.  I was miserable, the work was piling and time had stopped.  I sighed, put my head in my hands and closed my eyes.  I thought of my favorite walking trail.  It was a beautiful winter day and walking always cleared my head.  I traced the entire route in my mind, breathing in the remembered sights and sounds.  As I rounded the bend, there it was, my favorite spot.  The fork.

I don't know why I loved this spot so much.  Maybe it was the way light streamed through the trees.  The way the wind seemed to blow from every direction, cooling me after the long uphill hike.  I breathed in the fresh air, ready to make my normal right hand turn, yet I stopped, paralyzed.

I stood there, at that fork, for what seemed like ages.  The wind blowing through my thick, wool coat.  I wrapped the scarf around me and pulled out my mittens.  I should go right.  I always go right.  The trail was well worn.  I wouldn't get lost.  I could follow in the footsteps of so many before me.  The final destination calling out from the end of the path.  I could see it from here.  Right was the easy answer.

Left though, it was suddenly so tempting.  It was wild and unkempt.  The tree limbs and weeds obscuring its meandering trail.  Few had come this way.  I had no clue where it went.  My mind started envisioning so many possibilities.  The path could lead to untold beauty.

I suddenly laughed, scaring the drone in the cubicle next to me. My vision of the path ending in the greenest meadow I had ever seen was funny for some reason.  The daydream even included a young fawn nibbling on the emerald grass.  Ok Sarah, get a grip, it could also end in a swamp with both of your feet wet and cold and you suddenly lost.

Why was my daydream even contemplating this?  Go right, get it over with and get back to work.  Yet I didn't.  I went left.  Through the overgrown bush, my mind creating obstacles that my body was finding ways around.  I pushed through the entwined branches, through the thickets and thorns.  My coat ripping, the scarf long gone caught somewhere behind me.  I'd never been determined like this.  It was frightening, yet I couldn't stop.

In front of me suddenly was brick building, a bakery.  What the hell?  I'd never seen this before.  And suddenly I knew.

I picked my head up.  Grabbed the closest legal pad and scribbled down those 2 words.  I grabbed my pocketbook, my coat and walked out the door.  I was finally going left.

For the IndieInk Writing Challenge this week, Grace O'Malley challenged me with "I Hate Strategy Games" and I challenged Mare with "I never looked back".

Cascade Ice Water and Giveaway!

*****WE HAVE A WINNER!!*****

Congratulations Erin!!

Last week I was approached by the makers of Cascade Ice Water and asked if I would like to review their new 2 calorie Sugar-Free Flavored Sparkling Water and host a giveaway for my readers! The sparkling waters are gluten free, sodium free and caffeine free and come in 40 different flavors. I'm always interested in new Sugar Free products, especially anything that might be able to curb my Coke Zero habit.

I was given some of their most popular flavors to try. Overall I found the drinks to be refreshing and a nice change of pace compared to typical diet sodas.

The Orange Mango had nice flavor, but I found it to have a slight sucralose after taste, which made it my least favorite flavor.

The Watermelon Blueberry was great and was my daughter's favorite (yes she HAD to help me taste test them all!). The Cranberry Pomegranate has a nice crisp flavor which I really enjoyed. The Organic Lemon Lime was a refreshing, non-sweet, seltzer water.

Out of them all, the raspberry lemonade, might be my new favorite drink ever! It was perfect on its own, not too sweet, not too tart and I think would be wonderful used in "adult" drinks ;)

Honestly, the only true negative I could come up with is because the bottles are very tall and narrow they did not like to stand up in my fridge. I had to store them on the door. Small price to pay for some pretty tasty drinks!

Unfortunately for me, they aren't available in my part of the country yet. Fortunately for YOU, Cascade Ice Waters is offering to send one of my readers a package of their most popular flavors for you to try! In order to participate, please like Cascade Waters on Facebook (here) and then come back and leave me a comment by Sunday 6/26/2011, 12:00 pm (EST) ***EXTENDED**** Tuesday June 28th at 12:00am. Winner will be chosen by Random.org on Monday (6/27) Tuesday June 28th! Please make sure I have a way to contact you!

Picture does not represent actual product assortment winner will receive.

Disclaimer - Cascade Ice Waters provided me the drinks for free in exchange for this review and giveaway. The review is my honest opinion and was not influenced by Cascade Ice Waters.

Hampton Beach 2010

Arbors Graduation 6-11-10

Arbors Graduation 6-11-10, originally uploaded by floreksa.

My baby graduated preschool!!

She wrote that she wanted to be a Librarian when she grows up. When asked why - "because I like books!".

Most of the other girls in her class wanted to be Princesses. One aimed higher and went for Queen and another wanted to be a Mermaid. A few doctors and a mayor.

Happy Holidays

I'm BACK!

As punishment for going AWOL for the oh, millionth time...

Pay it Forward in a Crafty Kind of Way

I saw this at my friend Lisa's BLOG and thought that I don't have enough on my plate, so why the heck not add something else to do?

Here's how it works....The first 5 people to respond to this post will get something made by me, especially for you.

This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:

1- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make but I hope you will.
2- What I create will be just for you.
3- I have a year to get it to you.
4- You have no clue what it's going to be. It’s a surprise to both of us at this point.

The catch? You must re-post this on your blog and offer the same to the first 5 people who do the same on your blog.

Day Two - 30 Day Challenge

My legs have officially formed a mutiny. They are refusing to work properly. I feel like a marionette. I'm not entirely convinced that they won't just buckle under me while walking.

Today consisted of walk/runs, kick backs and knee lifts, side squats with bend overs, alternating lunges, arm curls, shoulder presses and some tennis (which I apparently have horrible hand-eye coordination.) Thankfully NO inline skating!

Day One - EA Sports Active

So I took the plunge a few days ago and bought the EA Sport Active for the Wii. I need to reign in this upward spiral of weight gain I've been on for, oh, basically forever.

I started the 30 Day Challenge today. I'm officially the most out of shape person alive. I set my course on Easy and I'm pretty sure the game was trying to kill me. I had a few not so choice words for my trainer when we did Inline skating FOR THE 2ND TIME.

Inline skating for those without the game consists of you squatting down, then jumping from that position, only to immediately return to the squat. Repeat 9 times! Yes 9.

The rest of the workout consisted of some walking/running, some squats, arm curls and side squats.

By the end I was huffing and puffing and barely made it up the stairs to the shower.

Can't wait for tomorrow. (ya, right!)

I am Old and Why Ally Will Always Know Her Metal Bands

We took Ally to her 1st hockey game today.

That's not why I feel old.

She wanted to know "when the hockey was going to start?" while piling in the popcorn.
3 minutes into the 1st period she started asking "when's the hockey going to end?"


During a break in the action, "You Give Love a Bad Name" started playing. The 3 teenagers behind us started guessing who sang it. THEY HAD TO GUESS...

Now I feel old!

"I think its Poison..."
"No, no...Its probably Motley Crue..."
"My mom loves 80's music"
"Ya, I think its Motley Crue"

Seriously?!?! Motley Crue?! Poison?!?! The seventeen year olds of today can mistake Bon Jovi for Motley Crue or Poison? They had to call one of their parents for the answer.

Now I feel old. Very, very old.

Then of course, in their next breath, one of the teenagers answered his cell and began to discuss how he shouldn't be bothered with a phone call when the only stollen prescription drugs involved are Adirol or Xanax. He doesn't move for anything less than "some good X".

I am old. Very, very old. AND if a lack of 80's metal band knowledge separates Ally from drugs, she will be very, very well versed!

Interview with Ally, Age 4

stolen from Major Bedhead


1. What is something mom always says to you? Poopie Diaper (we are knee-deep in fart jokes here, but No, I do not say Poopie Diaper to her unless its in the sentence "Stop saying Poopie Diaper")

2. What makes mom happy? When I'm being nice

3. What makes mom sad? when someone says a bad word "Allison mommy said not to say stupid" (said while doing a weird dance)

4. How does your mom make you laugh? say La La La lalalalalala

5. What was your mom like as a child? When you were 4 you could do the thing, but couldn't cry in the thing (ummmm, ok)

6. How old is your mom? 6

7. How tall is your mom? 6, 7 probably 8,9 (counts my leg, chest, head, arm) You're 8!

8. What is her favorite thing to do? color, cut and play and do chicken bock, bock and Christmas (ya...ok)

9. What does your mom do when you're not around? you watch TV and do your computer and do everything you like to do

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for? You'd go to, um, um, going....you do dancing. (ya, I don't think so)

11. What is your mom really good at? Um, reading?

12. What is your mom not very good at? Not, trying to dance

13. What does your mom do for her job? you work on your computer and then go eat lunch

14. What is your mom's favorite food? Um, corn?

15. What makes you proud of your mom? saying ...(breaks out into some sort of high pitched, whispering song)

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be? You and with the princess dress

17. What do you and your mom do together? Um, you bicycles

18. How are you and your mom the same? cause us have the same shirt *let the record show she's wearing a blue T-shirt and I have on an orange/brown sweater*

19. How are you and your mom different?Cause I want to talk about me....

20. How do you know your mom loves you? Cause you just give me a big hug...HEY HIS HEAD IS ON BACKWARDS!! (yes, Spongebob is winning this contest for attention)

21. Where is your mom's favorite place to go? Um, um, thingies?....Stores

Allison vs The Probe

I never really wrote about our experience with the impedance probe. Let's just say it will be a cold day in hell before I put her through that again. She was pathetic.

She wouldn't drink.

She wouldn't eat.

She wouldn't talk.

She wouldn't even swallow her own spit...

We ended up pulling it out early the next morning before we brought it all back to the hospital.

It was a horrible experience. My heart broke into a 1,000 pieces that day and night. Watching my child rather drool on herself then swallow. Refusing to talk. Refusing to even cry anymore.

But that didn't stop us from taking pictures.

SO without further ado...Here's

Ally vs The Probe

Death by Father Winter

Winter is slowly killing us. If my child spends another day indoors, without fresh air or the ability to run off her boundless energy, I may be forced to ship myself south.

Things are not pretty here.

Ally is wound so tight at the moment that the only sound in our house is screaming.

Have I mentioned its not pretty?

We have not seen grass since Christmas and there's still a good 6" that needs to melt.

I weep looking at pictures others are posting of shorts and short sleeves. Its still t-shirts under long sleeved shirts, under sweatshirts, under snow coats for us here.

And its only February...

Christmas and a Health Update

Ally goes for her next endoscopy tomorrow which will also involve an impedance probe being placed which she will have to wear for 24 hours. She will also have her lab work redone. Her last batch came back off the charts high for ongoing auto-immune damage, which as a T1 diabetic is scaring the hell out of me.

We won't get the results until 1/27 and that just seems way too far away.

DPP Day 16

The Tree:

Why you should never count on me...

Post once a day with a picture... How difficult could that be?

Apparently for me - IMPOSSIBLE

I had to cheat with 2 summer pictures too.

I'm a failure, a FAILURE I TELL YOU!

DPP Day 15

DPP Day 14

DPP Day 13

Still wishing for summer.